Categories
Comedy Humour Miscellaneous writing

Coming down

The man coming down from a great height said to the woman who had been watching that he appreciated her assistance and would be grateful if she could assist some more in finding a bathroom.

Will you go back up again? the woman asked.

Why ever not. The view is magnificent. Would you like me to show you?

I rather think not. I do not have a head for heights.

Heights! Why you think that is high?

To me it is. How did you get up there in the first place?

Oh, I asked another passer-by for a long ladder. They were very obliging.

Perhaps it is the same person who lent me this.

What did they look like?

Tall and wiry, a bit like you as a matter of fact.

Ha! That’ll be the same.

They asked if I could put it back where I found it.

Make sure you do young lady. It’s the only one long enough around these parts. Are you sure you wouldn’t like a peek from the top?

Quite sure. Have a good day, won’t you?

That I will. That I will. However, if you could hang around until I have bathed, that would be of further great assistance.

I will sit here at the bottom of the ladder and make sure no one takes it away.

You are very kind. I hope you will pass by this way again. It has been most enjoyable chatting to you. The folks around here don’t go in much for chatting. They are a very insular lot. I know that from my observations.

Maybe they think you are spying on them?

That has crossed my mind. But my attention is on greater things, things much further away.

What do you see from your perch up there?

Many wonderful things young lady. Things that would amaze you. I can see the past and the future.

Because you are so high?

Exactly.

Are you a god?

Ha! If only. Do you think I would need to wash and shave if I were a god? No, there is a taller pillar many furlongs from here. I can just about see it in the east. It touches the clouds.

East you say?

Yes. East.

Far you say?

Many many days’ journey.

Thank you. I might travel that way.

If you do, be sure to say hello. You will need a very long, long ladder I think.

c John Pitt, 2022

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Categories
Comedy Humour Miscellaneous writing

Six dancers dancing

Six dancers dancing, kicking up the dust.

Six dancers dancing, kicking up their heels.

Dance in the new year.

Dance with glee.

Dance in the new year.

Do it well.

Six dancers dancing, all will be well.

Six dancers dancing, there’s a story to tell.

Whatever this year brings,

It will come whatever we feel.

So dance with the dancers,

And dance with gleee.

c John pitt/ 2022

Categories
Comedy Miscellaneous writing

Conversation across water

Can you hear me?

Yes I can. Loud and clear.

What’s it like over there?

Very pleasant. What about where you are?

It’s OK.

We should do tea.

Why yes. That would be a lovely idea.

Why don’t you come over.

I don’t have a boat.

You could build one.

I don’t have any trees to fell. My island is barren.

Mine is too. I suppose one of us will have to swim.

I can’t swim.

Come to think of it, I never learnt either.

That’s a shame.

Perhaps if a ship comes by we could ask it to stop?

That’s a great idea. You are full of wonderful ideas.

I am.

But how?

We will light a fire.

We have no wood.

You have a point. Then we will wave at it. Someone will see us.

What if it is night time?

You have many questions.

I do.

When you have some answers let me know. Until then, Goodbye.

c John Pitt / 2021

Digital art created using Paper by WeTransfer

Categories
Comedy Humour Typographic ephemera

Digression on concrete poetry (reference A Hum[an Doc]ument)

With thanks to a recent commentator on this blog who refreshed my memory on the Sackner’s.

With reference to Tom Phillips and gratitude to Thames and Hudson, 1987: A Humument: A Treated Victorian Novel.  First Revised Edition, p.14.

STOP PRESS: 5th edition just published. This is a totally new treatment.

http://www.thamesandhudson.com/http://www.thamesandhudson.com/9780500290439

 

 

Categories
Comedy Humour lettering

Eating the letter R or Eric Gill for lunch

I recently posted on VS Naipaul and typography here. Still reading Mr Biswas I came on this sentence: ‘ “I could eat the Gill Sans R,” the editor said.’ [Everyman Edition, 1995, p.310).  I could eat the Gill Sans R! What a wonderful expression. Made me think what other letters I would choose to eat at a dinner party; indeed who I would invite to that dinner party to eat those letters. More to follow….your comments/guest list welcome.

Categories
Comedy lettering, typography, alphabets, stonework Typographic ephemera typography

Cricket and Typography

Please forgive this moment of indulgence. I live in Australia but am English by birth and, though I am now fortunate enough to have dual nationality, when it comes to cricket and especially the Ashes, I cannot but cheer for England.

Today, at five minutes to twelve noon, here on the east coast of Australia, England retained the Ashes series by an innings and millions of runs. Now I understand that for readers who, a) do not follow cricket. b) do not understand the dread rivalry between these two countries in this sport, this post will come as something of a dud.

However, I took this screen grab of the moment the Ashes victory was flashed on to the scoreboard at the Melbourne Cricket Ground. It is not the greatest of pictures (I took it with my camera pointed at my TV) but for me it is priceless. And the reason it is here? Well. What typeface is that?

Categories
Comedy Humour

Christmas cheer – English humour at its best

Nothing to do with typography – just rollicking fun.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAG39jKi0lI